This is slowly driving me crazy. I did this to myself. I had a goal of becoming less confrontational, more understanding, kind and patient. But the coin has a backside; my fist is wrapped inside a velvet glove which gives little warning when someone has crossed the line, and it's slowly choking me. Not to mention the facts that the kinder you are, the kinder people expect you to be, and the more patient you are, the more patience they expect. It's a whole new kind of vicious circle.
Why this rant?Well, I met another guy today that had trouble taking NO for an answer. It saddens me to say, but I understand very well why people become wary of strangers, especially foreigners. And I understand very well indeed why some women start to detest the male sex to the point of militant hysteria. I have had way too much trouble from men in my life not to see all of these points.
How am I supposed to do this? How am I supposed to be patient and kind when men only seem to have two modes for me: Either they have met the confrontational me and are shit scared, leaving them hostile. Or, they have seen my smiling eyes, talked to me, watched me walk on the road, whatever -and think I would be just the luckiest little girl in the world if they'd take notice and offer to be my 'friend'.
As a bonus -if they're really blind they think I'm stupid and/or need protecting.
The whole male species is starting to get on my very last nerve. I'm so close to abandoning good will, kindness, compassion and patience in favor of tearing them a new one just so they'll all leave me the fuck alone. Look further than the exterior for the love of all that's holy. Look, at me, not my eyes, my hair, my weight, my smile, my skin, my chest, my sex. Look. At. Me.
You, who want me. You, who think I should be yours, just because. Why can't a friendly chat ever be enough? Why do you always want more? Why can't you just answer my smile without asking for my heart. Why can't you just be a friend, without being lecherous and icky. How can you ever think that you love me, that I love you, when you don't even know who I am?
How am I supposed to do this? How am I supposed to be patient and kind when men only seem to have two modes for me: Either they have met the confrontational me and are shit scared, leaving them hostile. Or, they have seen my smiling eyes, talked to me, watched me walk on the road, whatever -and think I would be just the luckiest little girl in the world if they'd take notice and offer to be my 'friend'.
As a bonus -if they're really blind they think I'm stupid and/or need protecting.
The whole male species is starting to get on my very last nerve. I'm so close to abandoning good will, kindness, compassion and patience in favor of tearing them a new one just so they'll all leave me the fuck alone. Look further than the exterior for the love of all that's holy. Look, at me, not my eyes, my hair, my weight, my smile, my skin, my chest, my sex. Look. At. Me.
You, who want me. You, who think I should be yours, just because. Why can't a friendly chat ever be enough? Why do you always want more? Why can't you just answer my smile without asking for my heart. Why can't you just be a friend, without being lecherous and icky. How can you ever think that you love me, that I love you, when you don't even know who I am?
